Note to "public" cell phone users:

This goes out to the nice homely lady waiting for and riding bus 58 out of downtown Portland recently. Just because you CAN have personal discussions on the cell phone, doesn't mean you SHOULD.

We, the fellow passengers, have no real interest in your personal afairs. For example - despite what the other person on the end of the line might want to know, we certainly do not need to know that you are suffering your worst cramps in recent memory.

While I can sympathize with you, and I am sure many of our co-passengers can empathize with you - it is really none of our business.

But even if we were to feel some sort of tugging at our heart strings for your unfortunate suffering I feel fairly confident in pointing out that we really have no interest in the fact that you recently had vaginal discharge, which was determined to be caused by an infection which was treated by antibiotics and as such you are now feeling much better.

I am happy that your problem which would possibly embarrass most people has been diagnosed and apparently cured - but unless I am your husband, gynecologist, mother, sister, lover or priest - please leave me out of this discussion.

Just because I am next to you does not mean I need to be privy to the family skeletons.